Furious

Born and bred in this village I have slowly watched its demise. I remember when we had a Co-op, Bakery, Cobblers and Butchers. I can't remember when we had a Blacksmiths or Three pubs. I can remember however when we had numerous community buildings available for shin digs and high jinks which were places that provided an opportunity to meet new comers and old friends. I have watched as people spill from town to countryside (and why not its a great life) but why oh why do they try to change the countryside. Once the children have moved on from the little village school you loose that constant contact with your community and its important to have events that pull communites together. However many new comers don't want that they want to get in their car on weekends and disappear to shopping centres and they come to the countryside to get peace and quiet. They don't shop at the little village shop as a loaf of bread is a few pence dearer. I don't do my weekly shop here but I do visit the village post office and shop as much as I can. Its IMPORTANT country folk must support their local amenities whether its the pub the post office what ever they won't survive with out us. I am FURIOIUS because we have just discovered we are to loose our village post office........ this will be a massive loss to our community. John and Irene who run the post office and shop are fantastic people who have given this community a service second to none. We must learn to fight in this country for what we want , we are too Complacent. Come on the Brits we can do it.

Funny Day Feeling

I had one of those days last week when you get out of bed and you just know don't you? that something will happen today. I have a definite sixth sense about these things. Today was going to be a corker. It started with burning the toast, now that's not really a big issue is it? Well I get up early around 6.30am and try to be quiet, and there lies the first problem the more you try to be quiet the more you can't be, burning toast in our house sets off the smoke detector and our smoke detector would wake the dead . Once activated it is not easy to "shut up" it involves much slamming of doors and waving of cushions until the piercing shrill momentarily ceases, but don't hold your breath as two minutes later off it goes again and the whole process has to be repeated. While this episode was taking place I had flung open the top half of the stable door in the hope that the pume of stinky smoke would find its way out, I am never sure why I do this as I know from experience it just sends the smoke back in again. In a brief interlude between waving cushions and trying to produce some breakfast the paper delivery man had appeared and handed me the daily paper,he seemed in a bit of a hurry but then I was too. It was when I went for a shower that I realised that the previous evening I had gotten ready for bed in the dark, again trying to be quiet so as not disturb the human tractor who had gone to bed before me. I had put my nightdress on inside out, and back to front, something I often do after a tipple, so when I cast my eyes downwards I was horrified to realise why the paper man had been in a mad rush, the back of my nightdress is made up of more straps than the front, I am sure I don't need to say anymore except that I am not a small chested lady. The time between 7am and 9.30am passed without incident, then I went to help a lady take a bath. This lady loves to chat and has a brilliant sense of humour. We went through the usual routine of filling the bath and chatting about things like burnt toast. It was at the point when she was about to sit on her board, (she has arthritis and uses a bath board) that the funny day sensation kicked back in, the lady has a thing about not taking off her slippers until the last moment, as I turned to get a towel she decided to do a kind of jump kick action which would have impressed the likes of David Beckham, she was obviously hoping to launch the slipper across the bath room, but instead she moved the board and slithered into the bath like an elegant water boarding mermaid. My lovely lady was ecstatic she had not had a proper bath for years so this was a massive treat, on the other hand for me it was a nightmare. I rang the office who assured me another carer would be along in minutes, and yes true to their word within five minutes there were two of us rubbing our chins and trying to work out how we could get this lady out of the bath. The solution to this logistical problem was the fire brigade, so ten minutes later we heard them coming oh yes the siren was going full pelt (actually it was remarkably similar to our smoke detector) then they burst forth, five burly fireman dressed in full uniform with hats, they sprinted like bay watch boys up the stairs into the bathroom and lifted my lady like a butterfly out of the bath popping her onto the seat. She was delighted and may I add fully clothed something I had achieved before they arrived, she was giggling like a school girl, my work colleague and I were also all ooh and ahh must be that uniform. It was so surreal, they disappeared as fast they had arrived. My lovely mermaid was on a high she wondered why they had kept their hats on and then decided that they may have thought she would attack them with her walking stick so they had been very wise and then she thought she recognised one of two of them from the time a couple of months earlier when she had the chimney fire, it was all very exciting. With the morning safely behind me I progressed cautiously into the second half of the day, It was not as eventful, it consisted of loosing my purse, loosing two hens only to find them in next doors garden, pouring hot tea on my lap and cutting my own fringe on a wonky angle. Yes I hate it when you wake up with that funny day feeling.